My grief after losing our 5-year-old daughter to cancer in 1985 has never fully gone away, as it shouldn't. The edges of our grief gradually became less sharp, than ragged, and then somewhat smooth. Having a very active 3-year-old bouncing around helped distract us, as did the pregnancy with our third daughter, who was born a few months later and had the same cancer 3 and 1/2 months after that. The daughter born 3 years after that did not have the same cancer that I had passed on, which was an immense relief. I learned to live with the expectation that things at the moment are fine, and that I cannot be reading more into things than are actually there. I have learned to not catastrophize things that are going on, although I will readily admit that it has made me somewhat callous toward people that easily lose their $hit over things that are easily rectified. (Examples: undescended testicles in a newborn, appendicitis, tonsillitis... all these are fixable. I just have to remember to use my sympathy face.)
The room with the Agnes Martin paintings is my favorite sacred space in the Bay Area! I wish the museum treated it as such and demanded silence in the space for contemplation. Holy Holy
should we take a field trip someday while our children are at school? i'm totally serious. we could even do a group but the one rule to join would be: NO TALKING IN THE MARTIN ROOM
My grief after losing our 5-year-old daughter to cancer in 1985 has never fully gone away, as it shouldn't. The edges of our grief gradually became less sharp, than ragged, and then somewhat smooth. Having a very active 3-year-old bouncing around helped distract us, as did the pregnancy with our third daughter, who was born a few months later and had the same cancer 3 and 1/2 months after that. The daughter born 3 years after that did not have the same cancer that I had passed on, which was an immense relief. I learned to live with the expectation that things at the moment are fine, and that I cannot be reading more into things than are actually there. I have learned to not catastrophize things that are going on, although I will readily admit that it has made me somewhat callous toward people that easily lose their $hit over things that are easily rectified. (Examples: undescended testicles in a newborn, appendicitis, tonsillitis... all these are fixable. I just have to remember to use my sympathy face.)
The room with the Agnes Martin paintings is my favorite sacred space in the Bay Area! I wish the museum treated it as such and demanded silence in the space for contemplation. Holy Holy
Holy
should we take a field trip someday while our children are at school? i'm totally serious. we could even do a group but the one rule to join would be: NO TALKING IN THE MARTIN ROOM
I'm in!!! (and also totally serious)